Spring break needs to happen soon.

People are tense. Students are whiny. One of the TAs in the office next to mine stopped by yesterday to congratulate me on keeping my calm with my student who launched into a list of complaints about his first paper grade and kept insisting that I had discouraged him so much that I made him give up. It was nice to hear from an outside perspective that I handled it fairly well. I wish students would take personal responsibility for their own actions and grades.

People are tired. Tired people are complaining people. It feels hypocritical to complain about other people complaining.

Today is the birthday of both Toby and Zeke. Spring break needs to arrive so I can go home and celebrate. With cake.

Crushing their souls . . .

I handed back their papers this morning. My second class has never been more subdued. I wanted to tell them that it wasn't the end of the world, but I don't think they would have believed me. I wouldn't believe me.

I turned in a paper on Monday that is the worst paper I've written in a long time. I still want an A. All my professorial advice won't cheer me when it is not.

So I didn't tell them it wasn't the end of the world. It's something we each have to discover on our own. And then rediscover in the future.

A Grading Reflection

I'm nearing the end of my first pile of papers from this semester. My students displayed varying levels of ability - I almost said intelligence, but decided that wasn't quite fair. Because really, to me, writing is an indicator of intelligence. But these kids might not know that yet.

I'll be sorry to give the papers back. It signifies a change in our relationship. I'm no longer "Miss Hendrickson who knocked over a chair that one time and forces us to read news articles about mackerel fishing in Iceland." I become "Miss Hendrickson who gave me a bad grade and is ruining my GPA (and therefore my life) and who must hate me."

Students, I don't hate you. It's because I care about your success that I wrote that "D" on your paper. Six years down the road you're going to need to be able to write a coherent sentence and if you can't, there are worse consequences that a lowered GPA. Someday you'll need to be able to express the thinking you've done about an issue. If you can't, your solution - no matter how good it may be - will be passed over in favor of one more clearly articulated. This is to help you.

Papers. Almost done grading. Also, I'm writing a paper that will itself be graded. Then I'll have to read my own advice.

Mercy Hill

I've now been to the Mercy Hill church three consecutive Sundays. Third time must be the charm. I finally was greeted - by multiple people! I've also decided that I'm leaning toward attending regularly. My lean is decided enough that I filled out a visitor's card and turned it in. In return, they handed me a John Piper book. Another point in their favor.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about what is important to me in a church. And then I did a lot of thinking about how much it should matter what's important to me in a church. Then I thought about why I might value certain things in a church. Basically, there was thought. I need a church that believes what the Bible says. Mercy Hill has thus far lived up to that standard. Beyond that, I think what I value most in a church is genuineness. This is the most hipster church I've ever attended. The worship leader had a popped collar this morning and I feared for a minute that the pastor was wearing skinny jeans (false alarm: straight legged, but not skinny jeans). But underneath the hipster vibe, there is genuine emotion and a desire to worship. I think that's enough for me right now.

Plus, they keep giving me free bread. As a perpetually poor grad student, that is not a benefit at which to sneer.

Students and Studies

Next week my students turn in their first paper. We're all very nervous. I'm hoping that I've taught them enough; they're hoping that I'm not a tough grader; I know they're doomed to disappointment on that score.

To complicate things, I've just met two of my students for the first time. One of them spent the first few weeks of the semester being ill. He sounds confident and willing to work hard in order to catch up to the rest of the class. The more major issue is the student who has attended two classes out of the seven and has not turned in any of the assignments. He's a senior so this is probably his last semester. Unless he fails my class. Or unless I drop him from the class for excessive absences. Judging from his behavior, I'm feeling more pressure about that than he is.

The MA exam in which I must demonstrate a masterly knowledge of the entirety of British Literature is now only a year away. It's an intimidating thought. As part of my studying it has been recommended, by a past writer and grader of the exam, that I memorize a few poems. Apparently the ability to quote poetry in my answers will be impressive and show dedication. The poem this week is John Donne's Death Be Not Proud. 

Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull for, thou art not soe,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow
And soonest our best men with thee do goe,
Rest of their bones, and soules deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleep as well,
And better than thy stroake; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleepe past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
 

Newberry Day #3

I had a thought earlier today. I thought, "This would make a wonderful, witty anecdote for my blog." Then I promptly forgot said anecdote. Sorry, y'all. Somehow we'll soldier on.

Skipping the first session today felt good. None of the paper topics interested me, and having a leisurely morning was a good choice, especially since I have a lot of work to make up tomorrow. The session I did attend was excellent. Two papers on Shakespeare and one on Restoration comedy, so a little more in my wheelhouse than papers on Vesalius or patents.

Then I hopped slightly further downtown and met a group of Moody/Barakel people. They brought me a delightful birthday cupcake and brightened my day. I miss them. Hopefully we'll see one another again in April when I head back to Chicago again.

I escaped Chicago in late afternoon and found my way back to Milwaukee where I spent an evening with friends, laughing and playing games. Solid ending to a solid conference and a great beginning for a new year of living. Thanks to all for your birthday greetings!

Newberry Day #2

I spent the day listening to other people talk. It was great. There were some really interesting papers - pirates, corpses, the pox, assasins, etc.

Tonight I ventured out into Chicago and went to a concert of Robbie Burns poetry (and music). Apparently today is Robbie Burns day. It was good, but very soprano and harpsichordy. Then I floundered around downtown trying to find my pizza that I had ordered. Delicious pizza, it turns out.

Then I got back to the hotel and for the first time in my life was confronted with valet parking. I was not expecting it. Apparently it's what the hotel does when they have so many cars they start double-parking them. I asked for an explanation of the system and he explained it like I was four - potentially a good thing since I at least understood what he was saying. However, because I was not expecting valet parking, I didn't have any cash so couldn't tip him. Now I'm flooded with guilt.

Tomorrow I'm meeting up with some Barakel people, so am naturally very excited. Then I head back to Milwaukee where, since I got no work done tonight, I have a lot of things to accomplish.